‘Gods don’t have to choose. We take...’
Well, it’s finally happened. Someone has managed to caress my cold, dead heart into feeling something during a Marvel movie. I’ve always admired the craft, and Infinity War almost inspired a tug on the ol’ heartstrings but Spider-Man: No Way Home properly got me. And all it took was a heady dose of nostalgia…
Following his unmasking, things sure are looking tough for Pete Parker (Tom Holland). Half the world, drunk on conspiracy theories and naivety, firmly believe that Spider-Man is responsible for the London attacks and that Mysterio is some kind of fallen hero. As a result of this, no college will accept our hero, let alone his girlfriend MJ (Zendaya) or his best friend and guy in the chair, Ned (Jacob Batalon). To rectify this situation, our friendly neighbourhood Spider-Man enlists the help of his old pal Steve Strange (Benedict Cumberbatch), in order to cast a spell that results in everyone forgetting Parker’s real identity. Apart from MJ. And Ned. And Aunt May. Maybe. He can’t decide. And it is this indecision that leads to a hole in the metaverse and the appearance of a rogues gallery of franchise heroes and villains the likes of which have never been seen before.
The first thing to say about this movie is it feels like a Spider-Man movie. Not an Avengers movie. Not an MCU movie. But a proper Sam Raimi throwing a million ideas at the wall to see what sticks Spider-Man movie. And this is properly important. For better or worse, those first Spider-Man adaptations opened the door for the Marvelification of cinema. This is a testament to just how good they were. By smartly introducing the idea of the metaverse, director Jon Watts is able to bring back some old friends, namely Dr. Octavius (Alfred Molina), the Green Goblin (Willem Dafoe) and Electro (Jamie Foxx). Seeing Molina and Dafoe once again applying their considerable talents to this franchise made me realise just how forgettable and asinine Marvel villains became between Spider-Man 3 and the introduction of Thanos several movies later. This was partly a reflection of society in a post 9/11 world obsessed with militaristic imagery and surveillance and partly due to lazy storytelling, but both Molina and Dafoe demonstrate what the world has been missing this whole time. They truly are a pair of antagonists for the ages. Dafoe in particular is genuinely unsettling when he finally goes full heel and even Jamie Foxx fares much better here than he did in the actual Spider-Man movie in which he first appeared.
And that brings us to Spider-Man or Spider-Men as is the case here (someone cue up that meme). I always loved Andrew Garfield as Spidey and Tobey Maguire brought a weird guy energy to the whole thing that became iconic. To see them united with Tom Holland here is a genuine joy, as well as having the opportunity to enjoy them interacting with so many old foes. It is the introduction of Maguire and Garfield that really pushes this movie into a different place. The scene in which Ned somehow brings them all together in his grandmother’s kitchen is joyous. One of the best scenes that the MCU has ever produced. If they could have only shoehorned Kirsten Dunst in there somehow I would have been in heaven.
In the end, this is a Marvel movie that made me feel feelings. It’s a two and a half hour film that never once dragged or felt dull. It’s a celebration of the Spider-Man universe and it brings it all together in a way that is actually quite beautiful. As with Infinity War or The Empire Strikes Back, Spider-Man: No Way Home ends on such a down note. MJ can’t remember anything. Aunt May is gone. Peter Parker is a nobody again. And if Kevin Feige and his money counters could only find it in their obsidian hearts to let this franchise die on this hill then they would be dealing with one of the greatest superhero movies ever made. As it is, they will no doubt undo all of this next summer, but for now, let’s just enjoy the ride. Ok, it’s no Spider-Man 2, and maybe it’s not even The Amazing Spider-Man 2, but make no mistake, this is a genuinely great movie.
Anyway. Let’s go find emo Spider-Man, he must be knocking about in the metaverse somewhere…