‘Things get messy when you make a deal with the devil...’
Historically, dipshit director McG has made stuff that you would expect to be created by a guy who calls himself ‘McG’. The Charlie’s Angels movies. The worst Terminator movie. Music videos for goddamn Smash Mouth. It’s an execrable collection. Writer Brian Duffield has also had an underwhelming career. A Divergent movie here. A shitty Natalie Portman vehicle there. Certainly nothing to write home about. And if he did write home about it his letter would probably be derivative and uninspiring. And yet…
Cole (Judah Lewis) is a kid having a hard time. Everyone bullies him. Teachers laugh at him. He has a terrible haircut. But all of that is ok when he is around his babysitter, Bee (Samara Weaving). Bee lifts Cole up and makes him feel on top of the world. Until he stays up late one night and witnesses her jamming two knives into some guy’s head as part of a satanic ritual. Good times.
So, to summarise. We have a shitty director, a shitty writer and a really annoying kid actor in the main role. How in the name of all that is holy did all these elements combine to make such a genuinely thrilling movie? I have no idea, but it works. Yes Cole is annoying, and yes the general plot is unoriginal, but The Babysitter never lets up over its skinny 85 minute run time and Samara Weaving is utterly intoxicating as the titular babysitter. She carries the movie with a performance that is both nuanced and captivating and McG (ugh) makes sure that the high-octane splatter-filled fun never slows below 100mph.
This should be a terrible movie. Everything about it screams flop. But the proof is in the pudding. And I gobbled this pudding down like the chubby little funster that I am. A sequel, you say? I’m in.