‘And this is what the devil does...’
The problem with devoting yourself to one genre as completely as I have done with horror, is that eventually, you run out of stuff to watch. While this often leads to hours of watching terrible horror sequels, it also occasionally results in experiencing something as outright bonkers as Alucarda (and yes, that is ‘a Dracula’ backwards, and yes the rest of the movie is as odd and unfathomable as the title).
Alucarda (Tina Romero) is born to a poor, haunted woman (also played by Romero) in a mysterious outhouse near an ancient convent. Years later, Alucarda is joined at the convent by Justine (Susana Kamini) and, for reasons never explained, they immediately fall deeply in love and form a blood pact never to leave one another. Later, they encounter a hunchback gypsy (the cast list’s words, not mine…) and he… puts a curse on them, or something? What definitely happens is the two girls take part in an incredibly long blood ritual, for which they both have to be completely naked obviously, and then they become possessed by the devil? Or they become vampires? There’s a lot going on…
The best thing here is to just ignore the plot, and also ignore the terrible costumes and laughable ‘special effects’ and just enjoy the insanity. Tina Romero is rough around the edges but she is also incredibly committed. She also sounds faintly like Miss Piggy which, while distracting, is at least something of note to cling to.
In the end, I’m glad I watched Alucarda. Despite its low production values, it is genuinely unique, and offers a new slant on the whole witch/vampire/demon genre that has been saturated so much elsewhere. I’m not sure if it’s deserving of the amount of plaudits it has received in some quarters, but I found a lot here to enjoy despite, or perhaps because of, the ramshackle feel to the whole thing. One for horror completists for sure, but a film that has enough visceral power to feel worthwhile.