‘Piranha hunt in packs – not for protection, but for overwhelming force...’
The pyramids of Egypt. The Great Wall of China. The Mona Lisa. Piranha 3D. If the human race was to be wiped out tomorrow, it is only these cultural behemoths that will survive. The original Piranha was a semi-successful Jaws satire, the second a launchpad for James Cameron (and absolutely nothing else) but Piranha 3D is… something else entirely…
The concept here is simple. Piranhas plus spring break equals mayhem. Now, if that hasn’t sold you on Piranha 3D, just listen to this cast: Elisabeth Shue, Adam Scott, Jerry O’ Connell, Ving Rhames, CHRISTOPHER LLOYD – how many screen legends do you need?
Horror director Alexandre Aja has form in this area having helmed the gnarly remake of The Hills Have Eyes and the massively underrated alligator attack movie Crawl. This film epitomises a film director who fully understands the assignment. Piranha 3D understands its roots and embraces them by including as much nudity, partying and mindless violence as possible. When the piranha finally attack the spring breakers, Aja produces a demented 20-minute sequence that delights in killing as many people as possible in as many disgusting ways imaginable. It’s a tremendous sequence that had me chuckling at the sheer audacity of it all. Obviously, if you’re not a fan of B-movies then a film called Piranha 3D is probably not going to be for you, but if you like seeing limbs being chewed off and topless women being sliced in half (and honestly, who doesn’t like that) then look no further than Piranha 3D.
I felt dumber having watched this movie. Perfect. No notes.
