‘To have never gone to war is something to be proud of...’

The Things That Really Matter
‘To have never gone to war is something to be proud of...’
‘Everything that comes out of her mouth is a lie. Everything that goes into her mouth is a dick...’
‘If I show up at your door, chances are you did something to bring me there...’
‘Marriage is like a tense, unfunny version of Everybody Loves Raymond…’
‘Our dad’s definitely not a giant rat…’
‘Am I yelling? No… Because you’re not someone even worthy of that…’
‘The reality is that we do not wash our own laundry–it just gets dirtier...’